Know how when you meet someone impressive, you always try to cash in on all those fifty cent words in your vocabulary? Well, apparently, everyone in Eternia was impressive. I haven't seen such a gratuitous use of big, stupid words used as a design to make one appear intelligent since I was trapped in the elevator at NYU. Could you imagine if Skeletor challenged He-Man to a spelling bee? The entire planet would be up in arms.

I'm really trying to make sense of what's going on here...apparently Prince Adam needs to travel to some distant cave just so he can put on his fuzzy underwear and turn into He-Man. Is that all it takes? I mean, I'd wear fuzzy underwear too if it was going to turn me into an adonis with a cool green tiger who doesn't mind wearing fashionable headgear.

Does everyone in Eternia have the ability to teleport? Even fucking Teela is popping up from out of nowhere. Oh, I guess this is where Skeletor comes into play. He looks like he's going for the evil version of an Uncle Sam pose. He's also infringing on Mr. Roper's trademark by smiling to the audience. Fucking wanker.

Continue...