October 19, 2004:
Continuing on with the second part of the Slasher Costumes 4 Kids series, here's a look at the big man himself, Jason Voorhees. A Jason costume has for over two decades been the safest bet when it comes to costumes. You can get everything you need to look like the Friday the 13th antihero at toy stores, party shops and yes, even pharmacies. All ya really need is a hockey mask and a rubber machete, but the best Jason costumes add a little more spice. Weathered jumpsuits, a bit of ooze and a pair of evil boots all help to make your tribute to the durable retard as faithful as possible, and considering the "cool factor" surrounding Jason as discussed in yesterday's entry, he's always a top pick amongst boys ages 5-500.
In fact, my nephew (our costume model for this series) had beaten me to the punch -- he's actually going to be Jason for Halloween this year. Course, he's been wearing the costume pretty much everyday for the past two weeks, and given any opportunity to show off the wares to a new stranger, he's happy to oblige with a few well-placed "ch ch ch" sounds coming from beneath his cheapo rubber mask, which by this point must smell like bad crotch. Take a look…
Hey, that's not bad. They've taken one liberty in assuming Jason has miniaturized but active lava pits growing in the holes of his jumpsuit. The costume kit didn't arrive with Jason's machete (ten bucks more), and while there was a mask included, it wasn't the one shown above. It came with a full-head rubber mask depicting Jason's mask in a rather decrepit manner, focusing more on the gooey bits of plumpy soggy Jason skin oozing from the many slices of mask apparently missing. More on that in a minute.
My nephew couldn't deal with the idea of having a Jason costume without the requisite plastic hockey mask, pleading with my sister to spend an extra few bucks on an extra one mask. She agreed, because if you've ever been in one of those costume warehouses in October, you know that you could be driven to donate kidneys in exchange for a quicker escape. I understand the kid's reasoning, but when he gets older, he'll realize that the kit's included mask was much, much cooler. By then it will all be too late.
Judging by the color and shape of the parts of Jason's head we can see, he's either from Part III or IV. Overall, a decent costume. The jumpsuit is adequately ghoulish, looking more deadly than funny; the mask is loaded with head wounds and ill-will, and the price would be pretty reasonable if they cut ten bucks off it. I too picked up a Jason costume, click here to see it. Came with the same machete, a glorious beast with a Property of Camp Crystal Lake inscription. Again consisting only of a really ugly smock and a rubber mask, mine was a Jason more reminiscent of the reptilian Spawn creature from Pluto Station Six he appeared as in the later sequels. Look at me three times in a mirror:
The mask fragment left shields Abobo from view, and the jumpsuit cape looks like the end results of someone passionately painting or trying to make wine. My costume sucks.
Wow, two Jasons, and neither of us are from Part V. I cannot explain it. It smells of voodoo.
