Sammy: Hey guys, I was wondering... Where y'all from, anyways?


Freddy: Hell.

Leatherface: Texas.

Jason: ....

Freddy: Oh come on, say it. If Leatherface can talk, so can you.

Jason: ....

Freddy: You know, I've always hated this motherfucker.


Freddy: And you're not much better. People say that your stupid movie inspired my eighty stupid movies. Yeah, a child rapist who was burned to death and seeks revenge in ghostly form by preying on teenagers while they dream....and a retard who chainsaws people so he can cook them. Real similar. I hate you.

Leatherface: Oh, please. You're just upset because my new movie will probably outbank yours before its first month is over. And so what if I don't talk in my films? Can you name anything you said in "Freddy Vs. Jason" besides "bitch" and "owww?" You suck, Krueger. And so did that movie.

Jason: !!!!!!!

Leatherface: Be quiet, you. I don't care if you were in it. It still sucked. And boy, talk about rip-offs! The only difference between you and I is that idiots can't buy my mask at their local Modell's.

Jason: ....

Freddy: Talk! God damn you...TALK!!!

Leatherface: Yeah seriously, do like Freddy says. What is this, method acting?


Leatherface: So, I have a cooler mask than you, a cooler weapon than you, and I didn't need mommy to do all the work for me in my first movie. You're a joke.

Jason: ....

Leatherface: Hey Jason, if you don't respond to this question, then I know the answer is yes. Are you gay?

Freddy: Oh come on, Leatherface. We're not in the third grade anymore.

Leatherface: Maybe you aren't.


Sammy: Guys, guys! You really shouldn't be fighting like this. Think about it -- you're the greatest slashers in horror history! Don't bicker over who's gold and who's silver and who's bronze and who's...shit, ran out of medals. Point is, you're all gold in my book. Everyone agrees. You three should be buddies -- you're all aces!

Freddy: You know what, Sam? You're right. And you made your points very succinctly. For that, I won't try to kill you until tomorrow.


Freddy: So, we pals or what?

Leatherface: Yeah, let's let bygones be bygones. By the way, didya catch my new movie?

Freddy: Sure did, buddy.

Leatherface: What did you think of it? You can be honest.

Freddy: Let's let bygones be bygones.


Leatherface: Well, I guess I should make amends with you too, huh?

Jason: ....

Leatherface: Then we're cool? Good. Say, you never told us where you're from. Care to share?

Jason: ....

Leatherface: Come on, we're supposed to be friends now.

Jason: ....

Leatherface: Please?


Leatherface: Cute. Real cute. Hey Freddy, can we trade this guy in for Pinhead?

BACK TO THE COUNTDOWN!