Raspberry Kool-Aid:
One of the oldest packets I've been able to track down, Raspberry Kool-Aid lived and died before I was even a blip in a ballsack. The flavor in of itself seems to have fallen off the radar in recent times. Once thought of as an exotic treat, raspberries have been replaced with everything from mangoes to pomegranates in the Chic Fruit Club. Sad, because as we all know, red berry fruits are by default the kings of fruitland, forever better than any tree-grown edible even if they don't taste as wonderful. Why? Because they're red.
When thinking about Kool-Aid, Raspberry might never cross your mind. In fact, it was one of the original six flavors, predating even the Kool-Aid Man himself. Seen here in his utmost infancy stage, the "smiling pitcher" would spend years charming the world before someone realized that they'd make even more money off the image if they gave it legs, arms and witty repertoire. While many of the earliest television advertisements simply went for heartfelt shots of Mom pouring pitchers of liquid goodness for her darling family, it became clear that they were going after the wrong target. Moms are fine, but they're not the ones asking for Kool-Aid.
Kool-Aid needed a spokesman. Somebody who could connect with kids on every level, persuading every child on Earth to swear eternal allegiance to a powdered soft drink mix. For those ends, who better than Bugs Bunny?
Yes, for many years, it was Bugs Bunny --
not the Kool-Aid Man -- performing all of the hard sells. Much of Kool-Aid's success can be attributed to Bugs Bunny, as the commercials often aired during his own cartoon shows, which were at their peak popularity back then. Even the cardboard Kool-Aid displays in grocery stores featured hot rabbit action, and if that wasn't enough, the Kool-Aid packets each bore some Bugs-related joke, puzzle or game on the back.
Such efforts aren't as common with today's Kool-Aid, mostly because they've figured out how to make the powder
itself fun, whether through its color-changing ability or some other unnatural oddity that eliminates the need for jolly good times on the paper packets. Still, with any Kool-Aid, it all comes down to what you're gonna drink...
I've always been of the mind that Kool-Aid never goes "bad" -- that even the oldest, most antique store variety of Kool-Aid is still perfectly fine to introduce to one's insides. Now, I'm not so sure. It's got sort of a weird aftertaste that, while by no means rancid, kinda connects via one of those weird wires that run from your throat to your brain, delivering the unmistakable warning that you probably shouldn't be drinking forty-year-old Raspberry Kool-Aid.
With a rich, purply pink color that looks to be the love child of
Cherry and
Purplesaurus Rex, the few sips I'd allow myself paints Raspberry as much closer in taste to a Capri Sun than Kool-Aid -- not really a bad thing, but nonetheless unexpected. Though you can't buy this particular flavor outright these days, it's not so good that you should be losing sleep over it. So don't. Zzz.
--
Matt
