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The Super Mario Brothers Super Show! Who could forget such stupidity?
Presented by Matt on 04/16/00


As with most of what we talk about here on X-E, The Super Mario Brothers Super Show was just too stupid not to be loveable. Every fiber of our intelligence tells us that this was simply the cheesiest, worst show ever made. Yet somehow, it's got a special place in most of our hearts.

The time was 1989. The Super Mario legacy was hotter than Fryguy at this point, and the Fox Network thought it'd be a logical choice to milk it by getting the Super Mario Show on their network. Unfortunately, they got more than they bargained for. Yes, there was cartoon action, mostly based around the Super Mario Bros. II Nintendo game. But they didn't just get those great cartoons all the kids were sure to love. They also got this man:


CAPTAIN LOU ALBANO!!!!

There's no better way to endear a show to children than to make possibly the ugliest man on the planet it's star. The fact that Captain Lou was also a notorious wrestling manager for about 6,000 years didn't help matters much.

Apparently, back in the late 80s Lou was a star. For some reason, it was a very big deal that he was going to shave off his trademark beard and mustache to do the show. So big, in fact, that this ceremonial shaving took place live on the Regis and Kathie Lee show. If I remember correctly, about 3 audience members gave a pity clap. The rest either fell asleep or left in disgust.

Anyway, with Captain Lou as Mario, the show was certainly destined for greatness, no? Well, the producers felt they needed more. Luigi was added to the mix, played by Danny Wells. His ugliness rivaled Lou's, but he got away with it cuz he was a lot thinner. To stack the cards more in their favor, a few more cast members were added that were certain to delight the kids at home, including:

The Radigator: Some stupid dragon puppet who lived behind the sewer grate.
Edister: Some weird dude who for some reason lived under the floor and wore a gas mask.

Now convinced that an all-star cast was successfully assembled, it was time for the show to air!

With such wonderful props as the pizzaphone, and guest stars a plenty, it's no wonder the show was a success. No, I'm not being sarcastic...for a time it actually was, mainly based on the fact that the theme music was so addictive. Captain Lou dancing and singing to the tune of Do The Mario! in the end credits was enough to make even a corpse get down with it's bad self.

While the live action part of the show was asinine to the point where it should've been illegal, it actually had charm. It was train wreck television. Even the kids wondered how bad things would get. What horrible new guest character would show up next? Why was there a dragon living in a wall in a Brooklyn apartment that looked more like a Mexican pawn shop than a tidy homestead? Such questions were never answered.

The cartoon though, was definitely pretty good for it's time. It went on to spawn all the rest of the Nintendo cartoons we've seen through the years...Captain N, the Super Mario Bros. III cartoon, and so on. Kids with no social lives would get a special treat on Friday afternoons when a Zelda cartoon would be shown instead of the usual Mario and Luigi nonsense.

After changing the format, the series went under, but in it's short run it definitely left an impression on a lot of kids, including myself. I may sound like I'm ripping it to shreds, but hey, that's half the fun. It was like watching a bad Japanese monster movie just to see how fake the monster costumes were. This series was actually released on video, though you'll be hard pressed to find one nowadays.

And no guys, I didn't let you down. You probably figured...oh, this is just the history of that dumb cartoon with the catchy theme song. Yeah, that's true. But, guess what. Somehow, through my mushroom power, I have FOUND the actual opening theme music to the Super Mario Brothers Super Show!

DISCLAIMER: I can not and WILL NOT be held responsible if you download this. It's really annoying and highly addictive. I can't be held accountable for you listening to it, or for how many times a day you'll force yourself to listen to it.

CLICK HERE TO HEAR THAT HORRIBLE MUSIC!


Magic Johnson: Hey guys...mind if I come in?
Luigi: Why sure!
Mario: Yeah Magic, it's only 1989. No one's scared that you'll spill blood on them yet!

- Matt
matt@x-entertainment.com