Jason pulls up in his super Alpha Romeo, and, I'm not kidding, chalks up his lateness to being mobbed again at another one of those charity events. Remember how the Emperor told Luke that with each passing moment, he was growing closer and closer to the Dark Side? I can't help but feel that way about this comic. With every page, you're stepping further into areas no mortal ever should. It's just downright evil.

Just when it seems like you've hit the bottom of the barrel, things make a turn for the worse so severe, your head'll spin faster than Ian Zierling's did when he realized his new career consists solely of appearances on phone service commercials.

Check out this brilliant exchange:

Luke: Hey, Jay, have you ever thought of what this place would be like when we're gone from this world?
Jason: Huh? Oh, no, are you in one of those righteous Zen Master moods again?

Okay. I usually refrain from typing things like the following out in articles. I'm a fan of subtlety. But it's really necessary in this case:

HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHH! Holy SHIT! I can't believe they penciled those lines in there! This is fucking amazing. I had to make sure I wasn't crazy, so I showed that part to a few people. All of whom agreed there should be t-shirts made with the creed fashioned on 'em. For those of you who were a little concerned that a drawn version of Jason Priestly and Luke Perry wouldn't quite cut it, don't you worry...they're still some pretty cool motherfuckers!

Luke starts talking about how bad things are in the world. Unfortunately, he doesn't talk about anything in particular. I'm reading this and I'm reminded of the time back in '85 I spent studying the fine art of Voodoo rituals. I sat through these things watching Papa Shango and Dhalsim speak in a forked tongue. I couldn't quite understand what they were saying, but I knew I didn't want to hear it. Same deal with Luke. Through no fault of his own, Jason seems to comprehend Luke's myopia of disconnected syllables that somehow fill up and entire word bubble, and offers up the third gem statement from this page:

Jason: Yeah. Yeah, I know what you're saying, but with the increased rat race of people these days, it's hard to take a step back and look at the big picture, y'know?

Truer words were never spoken, Jay. Truer words were never spoken. What's next?