Princess of Eternia, she was stolen by Hordak at birth and taken to another dimension for no readily apparent reason other than the fact that Hordak is BAD.  Currently, she's a member of the Evil Horde, because the blind bitch can't tell that they're killing everyone in town.  Can He-Man help her find the truth?!

HORDAK:
Evil mastermind with the uncanny ability to morph into a giant, comical rocket at will.   Hordak is like Skeletor, only not quite so unsuccessful in his intentions.   Evil trademark: Hordak snorts when he's pleased.  When he's not pleased, his arm turns into a giant canon.  As you can tell, he's a pretty animated guy.

The Sorceress shoved a sword in Adam's face and sent him through a dimensional portal.  She didn't tell him what he was supposed to do, so Adam and Cringer just bought dinner.  But in the back of his mind, the Prince knows that he has to unravel the mystery of the magic sword.  Can he? 

Once Adora molests her new sword, she turns into She-Ra, who has longer hair and a skirt to signify her neo-feminism.  I'm not too shocked that the sword power grows her hair and gives her a cape - but I'm a little confused that it also dresses up her horse like a rich lady's poodle and gives it the ability to speak clearer than I can.

Well, they had to be here, since they're the only people in the universe who occassionally hit their intended target.  He-Man grew up wondering how he got so tan and why he never had any siblings - at least one of these mysteries will be solved by the time they finds out the sword's secret.

Finally, a villain who could get the job done!  Either Shadow Weaver was really loyal, or she and Hordak fuck.  Either way, they're pretty close - Weaver's spell keeps Adora in check, not to mention giving Hordak some special convenient insight into whatever he might need to know.  Aside from all this, Weaver suffers from constant laryngitis.

Mantennae is one of Hordak's henchman, and also one of X-E's favorite cameo stars.  He's got four legs, giant bat ears, and the power to hypnotize people.   Unfortunately, like most villains in the series, he still sucks balls.  He also sounds like he's on helium.

Madame Razz is the friendly sorceress - not quite as good of a sorceress as the other one we talked about, but at the very least, far more annoying.   Razz is a freedom fighter, looking to end the Horde's evil ways with the help of a talking broom with a pretty creative name. 

Another of Hordak's bargain bin warriors, this time around we've got a guy who has suction-cup hands that really don't serve any purpose.  He uses them to try crushing heads here and there, but we're relatively sure regular hands would do that job a little better than cushy pads.  Leech also wears legwarmers!

Queen Marlena's true powers aren't fully explored in the movie, but since she has wings, I'm thinking she's relatively important.  She's also quite obviously on drugs - check out those eyes.  And after you download the flick, check out her intriguing way of speaking.  Our first nigh-Eternian crackhead. 

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