03/24/2003 Entry: "Car troubles and inflatable toilets."

Saturday night was no fun. In my failed attempt to adjust to a stick shiftin' car, I gradually wore down my clutch, finally culminating with me and the woman breaking down at around exit 135 on the Garden State. In the middle of the night. With no candy. The car had an old phone, but the only number I could actually dial on it was '911.' The cops hooked me up with a tow truck, who brought us to a nearby Hilton. Keep in mind, I didn't have a cent on me. Couldn't even tip the poor guy, and he certainly looked like someone who didn't get tipped. So, we waltzed into the Hilton looking about as Hilton-like as a dog's ass, and wouldn't you know it - we stumbled in right when the hotel's night club was letting everyone out for the evening. The people who came out were a bunch of rich, drunken dickheads, so we took to hiding behind large fake plants until our ride came. Not a fun night, but at least the guy running the hotel check-in desk looked like the guy who gave Kevin two Turtle Doves in Home Alone 2.

Fixing the car, which is still in that hotel's parking lot, will likely cost 500-800 bucks. To try to raise funds, I'm selling off 20.00 lots of old collectibles. Each lot contains two Gremlins book-and-record sets, plus an old E.T. book about COLORS! Follow the provided link if you're interested. I've already got the first batch of orders ready for shipment.

Going back to this blog post, you might remember my strange fascination with a Ghoulies 2 inflatable toilet that was on eBay a while back. Luckily, I was able to find another, and didn't pass up on the opportunity this time around....

Isn't that just the coolest thing you've ever seen? I become so cheerful every time I look at it. The inflatable toilet is the Helen Hunt pocket watch to my Tom Hanks flashlight. Everyone in the world should have one of these. I'll be back with more later - we hit the thrifts last week, and I've got some interesting photos of half-eaten wrestling action figures and a neat thermos to show you. Before that, I've got to write tomorrow's article. It's about Presto Magix, which should excite the four of you who remember what Presto Magix kits are. The rest of you will just have to feign excitement and wing it. Got it?

Chestnuts roasted by the ZeroviruS @ 03/24/2003 03:06 AM EST

Sorry to hear about your troubles, Matt. If it makes you feel any better, I like your latest haircut/coloring job! As far as selling stuff goes -- a while back I seem to recall you selling X-E mystery boxes for $40. $40 was a bit steep (still is, for me), but I wonder if you wouldn't consider making, say, mini-mystery boxes? Not that you'll need to if the ET/Gremlins lots sell well (and I imagine they will) -- just making a suggestion. At any rate, good luck, guy. We <3 you.

Chestnuts roasted by Wes @ 03/24/2003 06:52 AM EST

I probably won't be selling mystery boxes again, for a few reasons. They're really tough to put together, and frankly, the last batch pretty much wiped me out of stuff. I wouldn't have enough 'moderately good stuff' left to fill them without dipping into my personal collection.

On the flipside, the current lots are much easier to handle. I've actually got all the orders filled already, and am keeping up as they come in. Since all the stuff is flat, I can just stuff large envelopes and be done with it. The lots aren't a bad deal pricewise, either. I assumed the Gremlins book-and-record sets are worth 6-8 each, with the E.T. book adding a few more bucks. Fairly conservative, and the 20.00 includes shipping. :)

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 03/24/2003 08:11 AM EST

I see -- a pity. I understand, though; I can't imagine parting with any of my precious junk and I flip out when my mother does silly things like open a sealed box of TMNT valentines to give to the 'special' children. And hey, you may not have a car, but at least you're not stuck in a dorm sharing a bathroom with some of the most disgusting people ever -- nothing says "good morning!" like a bowl full of shit and piss and pissed-on shit and shat-on piss. Good morning, indeed.

Chestnuts roasted by Wes @ 03/24/2003 10:17 AM EST

isn't that the first time we've ever seen you without sunglasses. You really are pushing those books hard...i wish you good luck.

Chestnuts roasted by kennef @ 03/24/2003 10:43 AM EST

well this sucks, looks like you picked the wrong area to peddle your woderful goodly goods...all the well wishers, but nobody collected the quarters from that wishing well...I'm guilty too. I wanna help, but like all else I am a poor poor person, who is underpaid for a stupid job. If I happen to come accross a $20 on the street though, I'll buy one from you. hey look there's a nickle! only $19.95 to go!

Chestnuts roasted by brandon @ 03/24/2003 11:08 AM EST

Hah, don't worry about it. :) A decent amount of people have placed orders, so I'm assuming I'll have close to what I need to pay for Mr. Car in a short while. Plus, it's fun faking celebrity autographs and drawing crude cars.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 03/24/2003 11:10 AM EST

Can i just order on of your fun car drawings for 5 bucks?? I will hang it up in my office, a little morale booster for me and my troops!

Chestnuts roasted by wack0 @ 03/24/2003 12:09 PM EST

I would easily pay 5 dollars (and more on top of that for postage) for any of the following pictures drawn by you:

- You celebrating your new car with Mr. T;
- You kicking a hobo on the floor;
- You eating a chunk out of Courtney Love's face.

You should consider selling drawings... you'd make a bit more money, I'd imagine.

CJ
www.geocities.com/mrtsightings

Chestnuts roasted by Curt J Kohen @ 03/24/2003 12:49 PM EST

Not a bad idea, actually. Maybe I'll run with it. :D

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 03/24/2003 12:52 PM EST

For the record, I have come up with the X-E t-shirt idea, and now this brilliant idea. I pity the foo who tries to steal my thunda!

Chestnuts roasted by wack0 @ 03/24/2003 01:39 PM EST

I'd be tempted to give you the $20 if only you'd FINISH THE DAMN CALENDAR!!!!

Chestnuts roasted by Rupert @ 03/24/2003 01:46 PM EST

if you're not selling mystery boxes then take down the fucking web page that advertises them.

Chestnuts roasted by smudge @ 03/24/2003 03:22 PM EST

No, you do it.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 03/24/2003 03:24 PM EST

This is off topic but I have share my find. I've recently aquired a box of the original Topps TMNT series 2 trading cards, the box is a little beat up but it only cost $2.50. each pack has 5 cards 1 sticker and 1 stick of gum. Thats right gum, disgusting horrible card gum. The gum has not stood the test of time, I tried it and tastes like cardboard that bum slept on in the summer. Well maybe not bad but defenitly not for consuming. Anyway had to share that with the world, and the cards aren't for sale sorry.

Chestnuts roasted by Patrick N @ 03/24/2003 04:20 PM EST

I don't mean to sound impersonal, Matt, but do you actually have a job that you get paid for, or is this site all you do? I mean, there are alot of us showing up to places to do things that we don't really care for doing and getting paid diddly-squat for it, and it's all in the name of survival.

What I'm really trying to say is how do you pay your bills?

Chestnuts roasted by Go Knock Jimmy Down @ 03/24/2003 06:40 PM EST

Whats with smudge and go knock jimmy down ? Matts had a bad enough weekend with the car. Lay off the guy.

Chestnuts roasted by gozar @ 03/24/2003 06:58 PM EST

Are there any possibilities of X-entertainment autographs, pictures, or iron-patches for t-shirts? You might have an easier time selling 5$ items that can be shipped with normal envelopes.

Good luck with the car!!

Chestnuts roasted by Giuliano @ 03/24/2003 07:16 PM EST

I have no legs. I make money answering grocery surveys.

Chestnuts roasted by Matt @ 03/24/2003 07:18 PM EST

You can make a living with grovery surveys?!?!?

I wanna do that...

And have there been any pictures of you from the waist up?

Chestnuts roasted by Giuliano @ 03/24/2003 07:31 PM EST

Matt,

Bring the car to a local high school auto shop. You only have to pay for the clutch while the kids learn for few weeks using your vehicle. It is not as dangerous as it might sound since the teacher must be a registered mechanic.

Chestnuts roasted by Michael @ 03/24/2003 09:34 PM EST

Hey, yeah, my buddies and i have also been wondering...how do you pay your bills???
Gorcery surveys for real??

Anyway, if u ever get X-E tishirts, oh man, put me down for a dozen!

Chestnuts roasted by Tony @ 03/25/2003 04:42 AM EST

Know how you feel Matt...because the axle on my VW just SNAPPED IN HALF due to the awful roads here in wonderful Michigan on Monday. When your car is perhaps a foot off the ground, and there's potholes something like twice that...bad combination. (It was dark, rainy, and a road I hadn't been on too. Joy.)

I hate the road commision.

Best of luck, Matt.

Chestnuts roasted by Ryan @ 03/25/2003 04:33 PM EST

I finally put it all together: a used Saturn breaks down in New Jersey because the clutch is shot. The exact same thing happened to my brother Matt on New Year's Day. Coincidence?
And is your car teal green too?

Chestnuts roasted by Welsh Rabbit @ 03/25/2003 08:10 PM EST

Matt is soooo damn hot! Screw the Gremlins book, I'd pay twenty bucks for Matt pics! Ironically enough there are very few pictures of Matt on XE... shy or what? ;-)

Chestnuts roasted by Jack @ 03/27/2003 03:06 AM EST

How does a grocery survey work? How do you get one of them from the local grocery and what does it entail? How much do they pay?

I only ask because I'm curious and I need to pick up extra money.

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