02/06/2006 Entry: "For My Sweethearts."

Valentine's Day is just around the corner, and for those of us with sweethearts, these are troubled times. We can only give our loved ones roses so many times before they realize that we're not exactly bursting with effort. Fortunately, the 2006 Valentine's Day season ushered in a few new options for those who need to turn their cash into pure romance.

This site has paid tribute to "Marshmallow Peeps" many times over its course, and I'd be more inclined to cut that out if the company stopped making such cool stuff. New this month is the official Marshmallow Peeps Valentine's Kit, consisting of four oversized, heart-shaped Peeps and a big tube of red cake icing. With these tools, you can write your significant other a love note that he or she can eat! As the smartest romantics have long known, the best kind of love is the love that makes you full. The kit retails for around two bucks. A dozen roses will run you about 30 times that amount. Any questions?

Sure, I know -- heart-shaped Peeps are nice, but you've been searching for something a little more "upscale." Fine. Look no further than Jones Soda's new "Valentine Jones" gift pack, sure to delight the hearts and tongues of anyone who associates soft drinks with a soft touch. Never a company to miss out on the opportunity to pillage a holiday in the name of merchandising, Jones Soda's latest foray includes two bottles of "Love Potion #6" soda, which taste somewhat like strawberry lemonade. The set also includes the same flavor as a lip balm, as well as a bunch of jokey, lovey dovey notecards and a sampler CD chock full of tunes that're sure to set your dial to a steamy February 14th. Costs around 12 bucks and comes packaged in an appalling cute pink box. Click here for more info or to buy one or to kiss one.

True, some sweethearts might be traditionalists. It might not feel like Valentine's Day to them if they're not the recipients of exorbitantly priced flowers and boxes full of 3 pieces of chocolate they like and 21 pieces of chocolate nobody on the planet likes. Everyone has their vices, but certainly there's room for some variety? Especially when that variety lets you paint marshmallows and drink awesomely-named soda?

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 02/07/2006 02:51 AM EST

I'm disappointed. Yet another holiday and flavor of Jones Soda I miss out on.

Oh uh, 11th!

Semper Fi,
Erik Majorwitz

Chestnuts roasted by Erik Majorwitz @ 02/07/2006 04:00 AM EST

You're too picky spaz307, I personally wouldn't mind dating a married mormon lesbian who has a kid.

Chestnuts roasted by dohopoki @ 02/07/2006 07:28 AM EST

Is the soda actually edible? Same with the Kool-Aid you reviewed.

Chestnuts roasted by Yama the Space Fish @ 02/07/2006 08:12 AM EST

i'm having valentine's day woes as well. i'm in a relatively new relationship and we haven't dropped the "L" bomb yet, so that eliminates about 94% of the cards I could get, and I have no clue what guys want as gifts. the last time I had a boyfriend on valentine's day, I got him a ski parka. true romance.

Chestnuts roasted by bitchpants @ 02/07/2006 08:52 AM EST

$12 for 2 sodas?! Total. Ripoff. I psid that much for 5 back before thanksgiving (which I still didn't open yet)

I, too am alone on V-Day, as always. I agree with spaz at that guys only want to know that they're out there blowing our paychecks on things that neither of us need that will be thrown out in less than 6 hours. That and...you know.

And how didn't I notice THIS blog? I was on here around the time Matt posted and never saw it!

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 02/07/2006 09:17 AM EST

This years v-day is a bit easier gift wise. I'm saving up for the E-ring, so my lady said it would be cool if we just went out to dinner. I will end up getting her something small just so she has something to open. Maybe if I fall into a lump of money I can give her the ring on vday, but I feel that is cliche.

Chestnuts roasted by Geoffinsanity @ 02/07/2006 09:38 AM EST

My theory is that what to get a guy for Valentine's Day all depends on the guy. This will be my 4th Valentine's Day as a married woman, and one thing I've learned about my husband is that sentimentality (when directed at him) is all but lost on him. I always felt that it had to be sweet, meaningful, thoughtful, and romantic. I drove myself crazy every year trying to think of something that would be loving without be girly. I gave him silk pajama pants one year (they sit in his drawer), had cookies hand delivered to his office (most of them ended up in the trash), even had flowers delivered to him in a desperate attempt to make him feel loved and extra special (in my defense, it was one of those "man-themed" bouquets. He still has the toy cars that came with it.) Then I realized, I was buying him gifts based on the kind of things I wanted. So, I figured he was doing the same thing and I took a look at the stuff he gave me. My first married Valentine's Day, I got a computer mouse. He had a reason (I had complained about the one at work), but you know...most romantic holiday of the year = office supplies? Now my approach is to buy him something small that he really wants (or needs) but won't spend the money to buy for himself, and that seems to work out best. This year, it's Super Mario Sunshine and, for tradition's sake, a Reese's Heart. I think this will be his favorite year yet.

By the way, guys, you probably hear this all the time (and some of you probably even do it), but it's SO true. Save the roses for later in the year when they're a lot cheaper, then surprise your woman on some random day. The reaction will be much more worth the money spent. I can't remember most of what I've gotten on Valentine's Days past, but I can probably list for you every time my husband has given me random flowers. Once, I was slammed at work and I hadn't been able to get lunch for days in a row. One day, he showed up at work at lunch time with sushi and a bouquet of flowers. It's probably the sweetest thing he's ever done for me.

Chestnuts roasted by Lori @ 02/07/2006 10:26 AM EST

I know what you mean Geoffinsanity, I can't wait for that show to come out on DVD either.

Chestnuts roasted by Rhino @ 02/07/2006 10:27 AM EST

^^^haha . . .I didn't even think of the show. I was so confused when I first read your comment.

Chestnuts roasted by Geoffinsanity @ 02/07/2006 10:39 AM EST

When I told my wife that Jones Soda has a Valentine's Day pack, she said "If that's what you're planning to buy me for Valentine's Day, we won't be talking for a long time," so I guess that's right out. It's all good, I got her a "bouquet" of three plush roses, a plush frog she was cooing over, and ordered a bottle of her favorite perfume. All the while, I'm telling her "I hope you're not expecting any gifts on Valentine's Day." Am I evil? Maybe, but it's fun.

She ordered me the new Stephen King book, and promised to take me out to dinner without complaining about my choice. It shall be heaven.

Chestnuts roasted by ZiZak @ 02/07/2006 10:41 AM EST

Ah, Valentine's Day. The least awesome holiday of the year. And I include Administrative Assistants Day in that statement. If you're single, you have an entire society trying to make you feel bad about it, and you end up getting drunk alone and listening to your Winamp playlist of "Songs which Make You Want to Eat Bleach." Or if you're in a relationship, you've suddenly got all this pressure to put into material form the love and devotion which you THOUGHT you had been expressing for the last X weeks/months/years but apparently not because you didn't buy someone a pink stuffed gorilla. Me? I'm gonna be working double shifts at the library, passing out bittersweets to the patrons, wearing my official Valentine's Day shirt, and reflecting out loud to anyone who will listen on the nature of love.

Oh, and if you can guess whether or not I'm single, I'll give you the gold star I got off spaz307's reference to "I'm an Asshole" by Dennis Leary.

Cheers, you poor, doomed bastards.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 02/07/2006 11:00 AM EST

Man I had no idea people took VDay so seriously. For me its always been about balloons and stuffed animals, ever since I was a little kid. So my SO has no difficulties there. Find some balloons with teddy bears, hearts or Hello Kitty and Im pretty happy as long as its attached to a stuffed puppy or something. He hates holidays in general so I usually make spaghetti and we watch a movie of his choice and afterwards have a lil fun. One year he let me pick out a movie at Blockbuster and I was really keyed into the whole VALENTINES DAY thing but they had nothing romantic left. We rented his favorite movie (Pulp Fiction) and had a nice time anyway.

So what if you are single? VDay is a great time to find another lonely person to spend the evening with. Lots of places have all kinds of Valentines themed events, from Sports Bars to churches, everyone hosts a singles dinner night. I actually envy those that dont have someone already, they can get all dressed to the nines and go out and find someone to appreciate their efforts.

If that aint your thing, then go hang out at a strip club or something. Dinner and a movie with some other single friends..etc. There are lots of options so you dont feel totally lost out there.

And good luck.

Chestnuts roasted by Kittycatgirl @ 02/07/2006 11:17 AM EST

From Jedoc's link:
Breakfast cereal is a constant part of your life, a faithful companion. Few people would ever consider being disloyal to their high-fibre friend and switch brands. Only in sex would anyone think of picking up "The cheapest thing there."

Pay heed also that people tend not to get bored of their cereals and sneak off to a diner to sample a few different varieties.

False assumption. The author takes his/her own experience and attempts to label everybody in the same manner. While I understand(and have experienced) the difference between infatuation and making a conscious choice to love someone not despite their faults, but because of them, this author just severely discredited themselves. I suggest finding a better diatribe, my friend.

Chestnuts roasted by ZiZak @ 02/07/2006 11:33 AM EST

Let's see, let's see...Valentine's Day plans...well, it looks like Valentine's is on a Tuesday this year, so I think it will go a little something like this.

Wake at 6, eat breakfast, class at 9:30, eat lunch, sit at computer, class at 2, sit at computer, eat dinner, sit at computer, watch new Scrubs, eat more while sitting at computer, go to bed.

Ah, the life of a college bachelor/hermit.

Chestnuts roasted by mtrox @ 02/07/2006 12:01 PM EST

Well, I'm a guy, and I know what I want for Valentine's Day. Beer! And porno! And books about war! (If you get the reference here, I owe you a gold star.)

Well, I should get it first, because I was going to put it in my earlier post, but forgot.

Don't forget the cuban cigars! And I'll be spending V-Day going really slow in the ultra-fast lane (while the people behind me are going insane), and parking in handicapped spaces, to check out the looks on the handicapped faces.

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 02/07/2006 12:02 PM EST

And click on my name for a little Peeps article I wrote (I've since gotten that Valentines decorating pack).

Chestnuts roasted by mtrox @ 02/07/2006 12:05 PM EST

ZiZak: I would come up with a systematic, logical defense of my humorously linked misanthropic prose-poem, but I... um... I have the typhoid.

Or the cholera.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 02/07/2006 12:39 PM EST

And I don't mean "my" as in I wrote it, but "my" as in I linked it. And by that I mean oh look at the happy shrimp.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 02/07/2006 12:59 PM EST

Any holiday can be jazzed up with the additions of skeletons and witches. At least in my little portion of the cosmos.
As for sappy, romantical, and otherwise love-type relationships, I have very few prospects in a town where either the goods girls are taken, or are related to me. If any female can put up with me, and not be determined to mold me into their ideal man, (I'm pretty moldy to begin with) then I'm up for the challenge. I adapted a principle I saw on a TV report about a boat race, where in the qualifying and registering of boats, judges take various measurements of certain parts of the ship. The numbers are then plugged into a formula, each number having a place therein. If the result comes out Six Feet, then the boat can race. I have sort of my own Six Foot Rule, if all the various attributes of a woman actually balance out and show she's a decent human being, then I'll make my usual clumsy attempt. Amazingly, it once led me to a girl who was six foot tall.
In case your eyes glazed over after the first sentence, here's the short form: have fun, and don't search for a Ideal, Perfect comapanion. If you're not going to settle for less than perfect, then niether is s/he, and you might not be it. Now, let's hear some stories of heartbreak!

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 02/07/2006 01:00 PM EST

Hey now! For some of us, the only time we've ever gotten flowers proper was for Admin Assistant's Day. Don't begrudge.
I find Xmas to be worse than V Day when it comes to the whole "the world falls in love but you're a lonely pathetisad fluke of humanity" feelings. It's only one day, after all.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 02/07/2006 02:01 PM EST

But if a woman ever got me some REALLY good Belgian beer for Valentine's Day, I'd probably propose to her.
I was actually thinking of that this year, minus the proposal part I think I might see if it works.

And Lori is totally right about the roses. Unless you KNOW your lady wants them, totally skip it and be original. I had an ex one time send me one rose for every month we were together. It was sweet for like 3 months and then it was like "okay, today I'm gonna get 7 roses" I know that sounds bitchy, but it's true.

Chestnuts roasted by kb @ 02/07/2006 02:03 PM EST

I'm thinking about taking my fiance out to the rocky horror picture show at midnight. This would be a lot different than other date movies (obviously), anyone ever been to one? Don't know what to expect as a RHPS "virgin"!

Chestnuts roasted by Fox @ 02/07/2006 02:06 PM EST

I've been (and still am) single for the past six years, so I still buy those goofy kiddie valentines (my favorites were the Pokemon ones) and hand them out to my friends. It makes them laugh and yearn for a time when life was simple enough to write "Do you like me? Check yes or no." on a paper airplane and hope your aim was good. This year I am also making peanut butter cookies, but only because we have an over abundance of hurricane peanut butter in our cabinets--5 freakin' jars! But I'm with kinglash--skeletons and witches should be a part of every holiday celebration.

Chestnuts roasted by violetdied @ 02/07/2006 02:07 PM EST

I love my guy to death, but he does NOT have a romantic bone in his body. Usually he doesn't get me anything, except a 'happy valentine's day', a hug and some sweet words. (if I'm lucky) Plus, his birthday is Feb. 13th! So, one day I am giving him a b-day gift and the next day I have to change gears and give him a V-day gift!

Usually we just go on a date and skip the gifts...although it sure would be swell if he would think to get me something- anything! I love the romantical stuff, but I would also go for toys, DVDs or comics! Sigh...now I just need to tell him that I am called 'Muppet Baby' on this XE website I am always talking about and point him in the direction of this blog!

Chestnuts roasted by Muppet Baby @ 02/07/2006 02:28 PM EST

G.I. Joe script review

Chestnuts roasted by Fridge @ 02/07/2006 02:35 PM EST

Hmm. I have a glow in the dark skeleton hanging in my room. A pair of raggedy wings, a bow and arrow set from the oy aisle, and prest, a boney Cupid to hang out on the porch this year. Back it up with a loop of "Love Stinks" from Wedding Singer and that's St Valentine's Day to me. Not that I'm cynical, just a twisted romantic.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 02/07/2006 02:46 PM EST

You know, some of my best memories are Valentines Day parties at school. The creation of my little card board box, looking at other’s boxes, and finally the various cards. The candy was good too.

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/07/2006 02:56 PM EST

*sends Jedoc some chicken soup for his tyhpoid... or cholera*

Hope you feel better!

Chestnuts roasted by ZiZak @ 02/07/2006 03:13 PM EST

Do you remember making little mail boxes out of cereal boxes and construction paper at school? Then we would all go around and deliver our valentines day cards. My favorite was anything Nintendo had to offer, and I seem to remember giving out a lot of TMNT cards with Krang and Shredder showing their warm side.

Any card that had those heart shaped suckers with the white candy paint on it was excellent. Only bad memory of this was when this one little girl handed me a card and told me that she didn't want to give me one, but her mom said that she had to give one to everyone.

Happy Early Valentines Day, X-E!!!

http://www.classicvideogames.ca/images/valentines/mariovine.jpg

Chestnuts roasted by Fox @ 02/07/2006 03:31 PM EST

Since I'm getting a root canal on the 23rd, Valentine's Day has somewhat of a shadow over it.

Chestnuts roasted by Jessica Marie @ 02/07/2006 03:48 PM EST

How's this for irony? I'm getting an echocardiogram on VD. I'm sure it's nothing bad though.

I saw Strawberry Peeps at Wal-Mart along with some other flavor (vanilla cream, I think) in the VD candy aisle.

You know what is great about VD if you're single? VD candy goes on sale the next day so you can load up on a bunch of goodies.

Did anyone catch the "bear holding a heart" commercial sketch on SNL last Saturday. Funny because it's true.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 02/07/2006 04:23 PM EST

I bought the Jones Soda on Sunday.

I'm so angry. I went to work yesterday at the job I started last Monday--and they FIRED me at the end of the day!! They said I was too young (I'm 23) and not experienced enough. Ok, whiz kids, if I'm too young and inexperienced, why the hell did you hire me?! Obviously, you saw my resume and job history and knew that I didn't have any managerial experience!!!!!! I don't get it--they wasted my time and their money keeping my for 6 days w/o giving me a proper chance. They said b/c I didn't stand up at the Department Manager's Meeting on my SECOND DAY and gave some kind of motivational speech about getting credits, that they couldn't keep me!! I HATE BOSCOV'S!!!!!!!!!

Man, I'm friggin' devistated. I really enjoyed my job and was learning--they could have given me a few more weeks before they decided it just wasn't working out.

Here's my question for you, whiz kids--what do you think? I understand company policy states that Boscov's can terminate employment within ninety days w/o reason, and on the other end, employees can leave w/o reason within that time frame. Termination six days into employement is hardly giving someone a chance.

My feeling is that MAYBE it would become too overwhelming for me, and I wasn't willing to work more than 40 hours a week like they were requiring. It was going to catch up to me eventually. Signing those termination papers was the WORST experience I have endured in a long time. I've never been fired before (I've left jobs for specific reasons--internship was starting--stayed at that job for two full years though; seasonal employment, not enough hours). I left my last job after 7 weeks b/c I wasn't enjoying it (I was a secretary/receptionist in a contracting office--it was boring work).

I'm not a sympathy whore (or a whore of any type--LOL), but I know I can come on here and confide in everyone. I've confided in my family, and I'm working on moving on (after crying and have a drink at dinner last night). I'm even beginning the job hunt again. I also have good new SNL DVDs. I think I'll be ok. :-) Besides, I get my hair cut and highlighted tomorrow. That ALWAYS makes me feel better!!!!

On a lighter note, Growing Pains season 1 is out. I'm sure you guys knew that though. I think someone on here said some time last year that it was a SIN that the show wasn't on DVD yet. I may have to get it.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/07/2006 04:48 PM EST

Ok, regarding Valentine's Day, I got the boyfriend Howie Mandell tickets. That should keep him happy for a while. But, we have to wait two months--the show isn't until April 8th. I also got him a yard sign that says "Phillies Fans Live Here. All others go home," or something like that. LOL--I'm a Yankees fan. I'm also giving him a framed pic from my senior photos.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/07/2006 04:57 PM EST

Our 1st Valentines together I went all out and made this basket w/all kinds of stuff he liked, I don't even remember what was in it...this is our 3rd Valentines together and I'm not much into it this year.

Probably will buy him and wrap it up of course, some beer; Harp or Bass probably and Overhaulin Season 2 which comes out the 14th, and doing anything he wants...in bed!

Chestnuts roasted by Jackie @ 02/07/2006 05:14 PM EST

Ok folks, to help her feel better, let's all send Allison frozen beef hearts for Valentine's Day. Nothing says "We Greatly Tolerate Your Presence" like a beef heart. Dipped in marshmallow and chocolate. Actually, in the name of chivalry, I should forget to take my Glyburide, drink a few cans of Red Bull, eat ten pounds of dark chocolate, grab my sawed-off croquet mallet, and take a trip to Boscov's (they're just upset that they're named after that bear in Evil Con Carne) to give 'em a good talking to. Bonk, bonk, on the head!

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 02/07/2006 05:23 PM EST

Allison: I'm so sorry. That's sucks. I'm finding I'm having the opposite problem. Jobs I think I could do I don't get even interviewed (or don't bother applying for) because I don't have enough experience, they don't train, or they want someone with with a better educational background (I got a 2-year degree in management among other stuff, but everyone seems to want the 4 year Bachelors or even a Masters degree.) It's a Catch-22.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 02/07/2006 05:23 PM EST

I was just reading an article that Mark Ruffalo and Sean Penn apparently beat up a photographer at Chris Penn's funeral. I tell ya, Sean Penn and photographers don't mix. Remember how Penn wound up in jail in the 1980s (I think 1987) for slugging a photographer. I'm having flashbacks here, folks.

They keep showing all kinds of clips and packages on the news about Coretta Scott King, because obviously today was her funeral. You gotta love these Gospel-type funerals/Sunday masses. I love how they emphasize all the important religious terminology.

"PRAAAAAAAAAAAISE THE LOOOOOOOOOOORD!"

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/07/2006 05:25 PM EST

JLAJRC, thanks for the support. you know something, I went on the interview thinking I didn't stand a chance, and look what happened. And then look what happened after that. Are you working now? If not, good luck finding a job as well.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/07/2006 05:26 PM EST

Somebody has probably already posted this, but the Super Mario Bros. Super Show is coming out on DVD March 28!! Yay!!! Click my name for a link to Amazon.

Chestnuts roasted by LuLu @ 02/07/2006 05:28 PM EST

I'm accepting frozen beef hearts. Send them in care of "Allison's Job Loss Sympathy Whore Fund." LOL--like I said, Im not a sympathy whore.

Kingklash, thank you for your joke. It made me laugh. So did my "PRAAAAAAAAAAAAAISE THE LOOOOOOOOOORD!" joke.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/07/2006 05:29 PM EST

Allison- Sorry about the job thingie. At least you can drown your sorrows away in jones soda.

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/07/2006 05:34 PM EST

And by thingie, I meant thingy.

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/07/2006 05:36 PM EST

*snicker*
"Thingy"

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 02/07/2006 05:42 PM EST

Darth Poop, you never cease to make me laugh. The boyfriend doesn't like Strawberry much, so it looks like I will be drowning my sorrows in Jones Soda.

Hehe--thingy. Yeah.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/07/2006 05:54 PM EST

I'm having an even different problem from Allison and JLAJRC! I keep running out for interviews in the middle of nowhere and having hot air blown up my ass about what great skills and training I have, only to get the "we hired someone with more experience" letter a few days later.

Hence I spent today helping store set-up for Dollar General. Apparently these people don't believe in fucking pallet jacks and instead unload the trucks by fucking hand. A bunch of people put shelving onto carts and I got somehow got stuck with the cruddy job of taking them off the carts and contiually heaving 30-50lb steel shelves into neat little fucking piles all damn day.

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 02/07/2006 06:14 PM EST

hey Muppet Baby I still have 2 of those "Batman Forever" mugs, they are two different sizes, ones like a coffee cup size, and the other one is a little bit taller. They are still in heavy rotation at my house.

I don't know what to get the girl I like, but I still have 5 days to figger that shit out.

late, I know, but:
Happy B-Day Matt!! Thank you for all the hard work over the years, all the "X" and all the "Entertainment" and even that hyphen...I love it! um, yeah.

I am listening to "2 Unlimited's Greatest Hits" and I didn't even know they had 20 songs total, much less enough for a greatest hits CD.
Y'all ready fo' this?!?

Chestnuts roasted by kidneyboy @ 02/07/2006 06:57 PM EST

I'm currently kicking back with a Jones Caramel Apple soda from last Halloween, and it's somehow even more heavenly than I remembered. Could it be possible that the caramel flavor intensifies over time? I remember it tasting more like apple soda in Sept/Oct but now it's hard to pick out anything but the caramel. Needless to say, it's the very essence of deliciousness.

Chestnuts roasted by Eddie Lightning Frog @ 02/07/2006 06:58 PM EST

Mystie: I know that letter VERY well. Only most of the time they just send it to me after just applying, no interview.

Allison: Currently looking for permanant work. I seem to have good luck with getting temp/seasonal jobs (I was a cashier at Sears during the Christmas season) but after that, nada.

I think part of the problem is that I honestly don't know what I'm capable of or where I want to be. I graduated community college with a degree, but I don't if I'll be able or even want to use it.

oh well, at least I'm having a good time watching soaps and talk shows. Those things are fun to watch.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 02/07/2006 06:59 PM EST

Mystie, I'm convinced they have those letters stockpiled in a filing cabinet, just waiting for rejected resumes to circulate.

I got one at one time that said "Dear Applicant." I haven't seen impersonality like that since...oh hell, that's as impersonal as it gets.

I started an essay two weeks ago about cynicism, and I left it unfinished b/c I accepted the job at Boscov's. Needless to say, the file on my computer is gettings lots of love today.

I'm a decent writer. I've been writing for awhile now, and I would like to to amount to something. I hope it can--I'm applying to ad agencies and marketing groups as we speak.

JLAJRC, I have become gotten way to into Dr. Phil. I always have liked Dr. Phil (I can be reassured that no matter how bad things get in my world, at least they don't hold a scented candle to some of the problems those people have). Haha, scented candle.

It's a problem having loads of ambition and no place to use it. I had so many great ideas for credit promotions for my new job--next month, I was going to establish an "American Idol"-type promotion! It was going to be fun.

Why?! Why?!

"This has been Allison's Complaint Corner. We now return you to your regularly scheduled blog, already in progress."

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/07/2006 07:33 PM EST

Fox:
The experience, I'm sure, differs majorly depending on where you go. There's a little independent theater in downtown Dayton, Ohio, called the Neon, and I went to see RHPS several times there during high school and college. I don't think they're showing it there anymore, which is a real shame.

Being that it was a relatively small location, there were always people who knew each other. They weren't cliquey tho, they were always really welcoming. For obvious reasons, the movie draws a large drag and transgendered following. There were always all sorts of people there, tho, from young (an off-duty policeman we met there one night turned the other way when he learned several of our group were 16 or younger, which was technically against the city's curfew, and occasionally some of the people would bring their kids) to aging hippies, to a regular who was a 60-something drag queen. Rarely was anyone at all assholish.

At the Neon, they liked to auction off RHPS virgins before the show started, which wasn't a big deal. Technically the virgin was supposed to sit with whoever won them, but usually didn't. The auction usually consisted of bidding the grossest thing you could come up with, and when the "auctioneer" would get disgusted by something, he'd declare that person the winner. There was also usually something slightly embarrassing done to the virgin, to encourage bidding, like for guys they'd ask what color underwear they were wearing, and they'd have the girls put their arms to their sides and bounce. Funny story, one of the first times I went a virgin responded to the underwear question with "I'm not wearing any" and the auctioneer jokingly said "yeah, prove it" and the virgin immediately just dropped trou (in front of a few dozen strangers, of course), stood there for a moment, then bent down and picked up his shorts. And no, he wasn't wearing any underwear, that was pretty darn clear to us sitting in the second row. There's not usually any real nudity, but then again, it's not uncommon, as the first time I went the guy playing Frank streaked through the aisles at one point during the movie.

At some theaters they have a stage in front of the screen for a cast to play the characters onscreen. At the Neon, they just did this in between the front row and the screen.

There are callbacks that are shouted by the audience during certain parts, but I know those vary widely by location. There are also certain props people like to bring to throw at certain parts of the movie, but depending on the theater, you may get frisked, because they do get a little sick of having to clean up rice, and toast, and toilet paper, and playing cards, etc, after each showing. If you want to bring props you might want to check with the theater you're going to to see what they allow.

You don't have to dress up as a character from the movie, but people often do. It also is kinda like halloween night outside the theater beforehand, because people like to come in all sorts of outfits and costumes. S&M wear would not be seen as out of place.

Altogether, for your first viewing, I would suggest you leave your inhibitions at home, and get ready for a fun, welcoming, gender-bending, exciting time.

Chestnuts roasted by mags @ 02/07/2006 07:38 PM EST

Unless you want to spend an exorbitant sum for your night out, I'd imagine the dress up would first REQUIRE you to OWN S&M wear. Too much info for this plains animal.

Chestnuts roasted by Rhino @ 02/07/2006 07:43 PM EST

Let me add to your complaint corner, Allison. I'm just glad I'm not the only one having job problems right now. I had to re-apply for the Acme job I've held for six years because I changed unions...and my paycheck was dropped two dollars because I was hired at the Jersey Shore, where apparently they hire people for more money because everything costs more. The woman who was supposed to process my re-application is now in the hospital and supposedly, no one knew about it until a few days ago. I live alone and haven't worked in almost two weeks. I don't really know where else to go to find a job around here. As with many of you, all the jobs I went to college for want more experience than I currently have. I have no ambition...and no place to use it. I just want to write, preferably creative writing, or edit or organize someone's file cabinet.

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 02/07/2006 08:39 PM EST

The first time I saw RHPS in the theater I was... 15 I think. My best friend was going with her mom and one of her mom's college students so I went with. Actually, so did her sister, Mari, who was like 10 at the time. It was at the Allentown theater, the one that used to be the longest running. Have an uncle that performed there for quite some time back in the early days. Saw it again in Denver, CO for Mari's 16th birthday. I bought her a lapdance from a transvestite. She still says it's the best present she ever got.

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 02/07/2006 08:46 PM EST

starwenn, where did you go to college, when did you graduate, and what did you major in? I majored in Communications, graduated from Stockton College, and graduated in December.

I know what you're saying though--I live at the shore as well, and everything cost more b/c the cost of living is so much more.

My question is, if a company wants experience, yet there aren't any jobs that provide this experience, where do you go? I'm glad I'm not the only one scratching my head.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/07/2006 09:02 PM EST

Unfortunately, at least according to my research (soon to be a graduated English major), it looks like internships are the way to get that experience. Oddly, that whole money thing gets in the way.

Chestnuts roasted by mtrox @ 02/07/2006 09:16 PM EST

I wish I knew about the internships while I was in college. Now that I graduated I'm not qualified for one now even though I wouldn't mind doing one.

Allison: I like the View. I also like watching Montel Williams when Psychic Sylvia Browne is there. Also big on All My Children.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 02/07/2006 09:27 PM EST

I, too, am a jobless Communications loser. A BS in BS and nowhere to apply it. (sigh)

Chestnuts roasted by Rhino @ 02/07/2006 09:43 PM EST

Kidneyboy- Wicked! Those are the exact same two Batman Forever mugs I also use heavily. Cool.

Alison- That sucks. Just awful and very unfair. I hate unfair work practices. I worked at a call center that laid everyone off with 2 days notice (they are required to give 4 to 6 weeks notice here) so I led the angry workers in the letter writing campaign and urged everyone NOT to sign the compensation package agreement. Basically, they would give you a few hundred bucks (or less, depending on how long you worked there) and this made you forfeit the right to EVER COMPLAIN ABOUT THE COMPANY IN PUBLIC! Doing so would get you in big trouble. So, I did not sign, and can now freely say: DO NOT ever work for an RMH call center that sells AT&T products!!

RHPS. Ahhh....saw it live for the first time with my MOM. Yeah- awkward.

Chestnuts roasted by Muppet Baby @ 02/07/2006 10:04 PM EST

Mags:

Thanks for the info. I knew to expect some stuff. I think my theater will allow rice and toilet paper, but I just looked up another site that the players at the theater host and they also say to bring cards, a newspaper, and a lighter. I can't wait because these people look like they go all out. Here is a link if anyone wants to see how much of a production they do.
http://www.lickitlips.com/

Chestnuts roasted by Fox @ 02/07/2006 10:11 PM EST

Man, Valentines day was a lot more fun in elementary school, when you could spend a whole week making a clever box to hold your valentines, and then get valentines from every person in the class. Most of them were really cool, too. Star Wars, TMNT, etc.

Now, Valentine's day is just another reminder that I'm in my fifth year of college and still haven't found anyone yet. Oh Well.

Chestnuts roasted by Cameron T. @ 02/08/2006 01:06 AM EST

To Allison and Mystie: You should like this. I wrote it out of frustration, natch.

Chestnuts roasted by Mars @ 02/08/2006 02:39 AM EST

Allison: That sucks about your job. I graduated in 04' with a degree in communication. I didn't find a job until march of 05' and it isn't even in the communcation field. Good luck.

Chestnuts roasted by Geoffinsanity @ 02/08/2006 07:53 AM EST

Allison
Sorry to hear about your job, from your other posts here it seemed that you were really excited about it. I think you answered your own question about "why did they fire [you]?" though.
I wasn't willing to work more than 40 hours a week like they were requiring.
Don't misunderstand, as I'm not attempting to attack you, but if you're not willing to meet the job requirements, then why should it be surprising that you're not allowed to keep the job?
I really do wish you the best of luck in finding a better place of employment, though. You should have had more warning than just being told to go home on your 6th day. That's a pretty crappy business practice.

Chestnuts roasted by ZiZak @ 02/08/2006 09:07 AM EST

Hey, I'm currently unemployable as well. XE never fails to foster a sense of community. I got my BA in English last May, which had the effect of making me overqualified for a job at McDonald's, while leaving me sorely underqualified for a job anywhere else. So until I get my Master of Library Science degree, I'm pretty much relying on the goodwill of any prospective employers.

Hint: employers have little or no inherent goodwill.

Anyway, here's hoping that the Books-a-Million in the mall will recognize the shrewd investment an MLIS student would represent. Wait, screw that. Here's hoping a wealthy yet reclusive European landowner will contact me and offer to become my patron, paying me lucrative sums to write and publish novels. Yeah, that's better.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 02/08/2006 10:07 AM EST

We have touched on something that is a royal pet peeve of mine, but I'll attempt to keep the diatribe as short as possible...

When I was in high school, my dad worked in the field that I was sure I wanted to work in. One night as I was hanging out at work with him, he said of the many graduate students he dealt with, "Most of these kids have the book knowledge, but they don't have any practical knowledge. You'd be much better off just taking some training courses and learning the equipment. In this industry, they don't care what you know as much as they care that you can do the job." I gave what he said a lot of thought, and after high school pursued the few internships that didn't require college enrollment and some production assistance work. After working in the field a few years, and deciding that I hated what had been my lifelong dream (quite a blow), I spent a couple of years doing retail/grocery to pay the bills before eventually landing an assistant job at a tiny advertising/graphics agency. I was there for a few years, learning everything I could and eventually becoming production manager of an ongoing project. Now, I'm pursuing freelance graphic design using the skills I learned there.
It's not a Time Magazine Woman of the Year story or anything, but I've done OK. You still wouldn't believe how many people in my life (and I'm going on 27) still say, "So, are you finally considering college?" "I still think life would be so much easier for you if you had a degree." When will people get it into their heads that a college degree is no longer this golden ticket to any job you want at any salary you ask for? My husband's best friend got a four-year-degree from UVA a couple of years ago and he's happy because has a steady job at the Men's Wearhouse. I believe a lot of us were sold a false bill of goods - get a degree and you'll never have to worry about your future. I'm not saying that college degrees are useless and that we should tell the next generation not to bother, I'm just saying we need to paint a more realistic picture of what to expect once you get that degree. (And not to tell someone who's entering a field that values skills over education that she's "throwing her life away" by not going to college. That really hurt.)

And for the record, I really don't feel like 6 days is enough to see what someone is capable of. They could have at least said, "Here are some concerns we have" and, at the very least, given you another week to address them. I know it sucks to be jobless, but that doesn't sound like the kind of company you want to work for.

Chestnuts roasted by Lori @ 02/08/2006 11:02 AM EST

The requirements have certainly been punched up. If you're looking for a career, and not just a job that you can be fired from at any time, a master's degree is practically a minimum these days. And it is, like so many things in our poor benighted world, the fault of the Boomers. They were the first generation to have no memory of the Great Depression, and so it was a socially valid plan to put themselves deeply into debt in order to give their children the college education they never got, because their parents remembered what it was like to have nothing and avoid mortgages and loans like the plague if there is any alternative. As a result, there has been a massive, ongoing influx of college graduates for the last decade or two into an economy geared for a much smaller number of highly educated workers. As a result, fully half of all college graduates today are either unemployed or severely underemployed. And the really fun part? Many of the younger Boomers are going back to college to earn their degrees and make themselves more competitive in the modern job market, exacerbating the problem to an even greater degree. Most of you who are in college now have seen them in your classes, usually wasting everyone's time by raising their hand as though they actually have a question and then rephrasing what the teacher just said "just to make sure they got it right."

And so the answer is obvious: Soylent Green. With one major difference. Back then, everyone was expecting a massive food shortage due to overpopulation which didn't happen, largely thanks to the Green Revolution. Our modern problems require a modern solution. Render all Baby Boomers into a usable fuel source rather than a food source. I suggest an ad campaign calling the substance Baby (boomer) Oil. I predict that Boomers will burn cleaner, be cheaper, and require less infrastructure than fossil fuels or currently available alternative fuels.

So save the world, kids. Burn a Boomer.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 02/08/2006 11:37 AM EST

Huh. Teachers and textbooks in my major are constantly harping on the fact that the pay is dismal, which was bumming me out, but there is guaranteed work out there. Everyone's posts are making me feel a bit better about all that (Once upon a way back when I wanted to be an English major myself but that didn't work out).

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 02/08/2006 11:44 AM EST

I know how you feel squee. Remember way back when those guidance counselors told us "the world can be yours as long as you have you bachelors degree"? Now if you don't have a masters you don't have anything in my field. My best friend went to welding school, no college, with just his GED and now he makes anywhere from 40 to 60 dollars an hour and works about 30 to 50 hours per week.
As for Allison, I'm sure the reason you were let go was that there is the perfect job is waiting somewhere for you to find it. Its Ok to get fired from a job at a young age, it gives you mystery. Oh, and the beef hearts are on the way.

Chestnuts roasted by bloodybrilliantme @ 02/08/2006 11:51 AM EST

I too know how hard it can be to break into your first job after college. I had to move 1400 miles from where I grew up, to a town where I didn't know anyone, and I was glad to do it by the time it finally happened. I had to move back home with Mom and Dad after college, and although they tried really hard to be cool, moving in with your parents after having a blast at college for the previous 4 years sucks. It was even worse because I was 25 at the time- too damn old to be living in my parents' basement. It was even more awful after I got my job offer and I was on my way out, because I had to wait several months for my security clearance. I had my interview in August and started work the following July. I was almost 27 before I moved out of my parents' place for good. *shudder*

Still, while I doubt that they are any high-school aged people on this site, I hope they don't start to think that college is a total waste of time. For one thing, I grew up a lot in collge, and had a blast doing it. For another, I made some lifelong friends. I think it's a matter of majoring in something that has a commercial demand for it, rather than just something that's looks easy or seems like it might be interesting at the time. Back when far fewer people went to college, there were far fewer Communications majors, Business majors, English majors, etc. Nowadays there are tons of graduates in what are perceived as the "easy" majors. However, majors in science and engineering are still in demand, just like always. An engineering major still isn't a magic ticket, but it's going to get you farther than a degree in licking dead cats (see Mars's link).

Finally, if you have a degree you should be expecting to work more than forty hours a week. I work at least a couple of hours overtime every week, and usually go in about every other weekend for at least one day. Mostly I get no extra pay for my extra time, or if I do get paid it's a pittance that barely covers the gas for the commute I made on my day off. It just comes with the territory when you're a professional.

Sometimes though, you just gotta' take a vacation day, like I am today. Woo hoo! Playing hooky from work rocks almost as much as skipping school!

Chestnuts roasted by spaz307 @ 02/08/2006 11:51 AM EST

6 wings for $6.95? Thats.......AWESOME!

Million points if you know what thats from.

Chestnuts roasted by TommyDay @ 02/08/2006 12:33 PM EST

What was the name of that story where the little girl asks, "Why don't they just feed the homeless people to the poor people?" And I think the point was that there was a secret government project starting up that was doing just that. Kind of an extreme take on what Scrooge said about surplus population.
A wise man once said, "Man who fall asleep with itchy butt...", no, that wasn't it. "Never eat anything bigger than your head", no. "Don't pet a cat with a shovel?" No. "Close cover before striking." No.
Got it. "Find a job doing something you love, and you'll never work a day in your life." At least remember what Venkman said, "Einstein did his best work while he was a patent clerk." Just keep pluggng away, and as long as you show you can do great work at whatever job you find youself in, somebody will notice. Worked for Little Brother. Did whatever job he was asked to when he worked at McD's. Was eventually offered a mangerial position, but he didn't want to be held accountable for others' buttheadery. Now he works at a local bakery/cafe in Lawrence, KS, and with the same work ethic, is moving steadly up the ranks again. And importantly, he's having fun.
Do what you like, have fun at it, do it well, and remember, you got us posters for support. Think of the X as a unholy composite of Dear Abby, Don Rickles, and Dennis Miller. We got advice, but you might be too much of a hockeypuck to understand it, cha-cha.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 02/08/2006 12:34 PM EST

I have been considering going back to school (again) for some time now. However I see many of my friends like many of you can't get a job in their field and sometimes just can't even get a foot in the door.
My recently graduated sister just quit her job which was in her field of study, but required 50+ hours per week in exchange for a 32 hour a week coffee shop manager position with greater pay and equal benifets.
Getting past that hump sounds difficult. Well good luck to all the job searchers!

Chestnuts roasted by kb @ 02/08/2006 01:14 PM EST

Well, I have no room to talk, I'd love to hide in academia the rest of my days.

Anyone seen When A Stranger Calls? I'm sure it sucks, but Camilla Belle needs to play Rinoa in the FFVIII movie. Tell me she's not PERFECT for it.

Rachael Leigh Cook as Selphie of course Matthew Lillard as Zell. And I KNOW Raine Maida would do a bang up job in his acting debut as Squall

Chestnuts roasted by Knegative @ 02/08/2006 02:31 PM EST

"Get a degree," they said. "Any degree will do," they encouraged. So I got a BA in history. HISTORY. Then an MA in history. HISTORY. Aside from teaching, what the hell can you do with that?

The answer is, not much. Great thing is, I had a friend who had a friend who worked for an advertising agency who needed a traffic coodinator (basically, keeps everyone on deadlines). I had no idea what that was at the time, but got the job through word of mouth. And you know what? I love it. Could I have gotten the job without a degree? Probably. But not without the contacts. And that is my soapbox sermon for the day, kids. Degrees are shit, but contacts are everything.

Chestnuts roasted by purplegirl247 @ 02/08/2006 02:44 PM EST

I don't really know how to weigh in on the "college degree, but no job" issue. I have no college degree, and a job. Not a great, going-to-make-me-rich job, but a job that pays the bills and affords me some luxuries, as long as I don't mind being frugal in other areas. And it's not a McJob, either.. I sit on my ass and browse the 'net a lot, between what little work I have to do for my actual job. I did not get this job through contacts, either.

In summation: I am a lucky(and magnificent) bastard.

Chestnuts roasted by ZiZak @ 02/08/2006 02:56 PM EST

ZiZak you magnificent bastard, I read your book.

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/08/2006 03:56 PM EST

Stop worrying me, I'm in grad school now. Though I am finding a lot of good contacts, and I'm seeing how that is the real ticket. I hope my education boosts my salary somewhat.

And When A Stranger Calls, does indeed suck. And I hardly ever dislike movies, because I love movies, almost all movies. It was a fun movie, and I saw it as a sneak for free, so that made up for it. Basically, if you want about an hour of cheap scares (Ah, oh it's just the cat) and twenty minutes of thrill, go see it, if you are bored, and nothing else is playing, and you lost a bet, also you probably should be 14.

Chestnuts roasted by Fox @ 02/08/2006 04:06 PM EST

...And just *that* fast, everything changes. I've got an interview on Monday at the MTV Control Station/Center/Place/Thing on Long Island. A foot in the door, people! Yay! Alright, that is all.

Chestnuts roasted by Rhino @ 02/08/2006 04:18 PM EST

That's great, Rhino! Obviously, you'll let us all know how it goes. May you be more magnificent than even am I.

Chestnuts roasted by ZiZak @ 02/08/2006 04:43 PM EST

Congrats Rhino!

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/08/2006 04:47 PM EST

Contacts do seem to work. It worked for Dr. Phil.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 02/08/2006 05:35 PM EST

Wow, what a load of long-winded serious posts. o.o Damn. And on a Peeps and Jones blog no less!

Oh well. Since we're sharing job stories of woe... I worked for Wal-Mart for a year and half, had no disciplinary marks on my record, great worker, rarely called out. One day I opened up Paint on the computer at Customer Service a doodled up a picture of myself and wrote "Victoria [my real name] ownz j00" on it and clicked the "set as background" button. Well apparently management saw this as stealing company time and misusing company property and opted to immediately terminate me. Here's where it gets good. I was suffering from near-suicidal depression at the time and was a cutter. The store manager was well aware of this. But instead she had some asshat fire me and act like a dick about it. I starting having a severe panic attack and told the douche to call the ER as I was medically required to go there if I felt I'd hurt myself. He refused to call. I asked again. He still refused. Eventually I called my mother and had her pick me up because I didn't feel safe driving. And thanks to the wonders of band-aids and neosporin you can barely even see the scars anymore.

And just not to freak ya'll out, don't worry, I've been totally fine and happy for over a year now. ^_^;;

I also have a job interview Friday, but I won't say where. ::avoids glares from Allison::

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 02/08/2006 05:42 PM EST

We all bow to the aphrodisiac properties of your horn, Rhino. It apparently gets you good jobs as well.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 02/08/2006 05:44 PM EST

Hey, I'm feeling a little better today. Your stories are all helping. I was still upset today--I'm stubborn and its getting the better of me.

Tomorrow I'm gonna call over to my old Elementary school district and see how I can go about becoming a substitute. My parents also said they would pay to send me back to college to get my teacher's certification if I wanted to--I can afford it, but they said if that's what it takes to get a decent job, then so be it. Substituting is also great money in this town--the Little Egg Harbor School District (of which I am a proud alumna of--Little Egg Harbor Twp. Intermediate School Class of 1995) pays abround $100 a day for subs. It may be even more now--It was $95 a day in 1997. It costs $150 to take a sub certification course (for 3 days). So, I'll see what I can do. Hell, I'll still have time to write if I wanted to. I also know the substitute coordinator for the school district--we live in the same neighborhood, and her oldest kid was friends with my brother and his friends.

The advantage of my small community is that there are 5 local elementary school districts--Little Egg Harbor, Tuckerton Borough, Bass River Twp./New Gretna, and Eagleswood Twp./West Creek.

Well, that's my game plan for tomorrow.

Mystie, good luck on your interview. I harbor no bitter feelings for you going on an interview there. At least its not the Egg Harbor/Atlantic City store.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/08/2006 07:19 PM EST

Carnivale fans, take note! Clancy Brown guests on Lost tonight! It's like the peanut butter/chocolate equation, except it's a collision of mysterious spooky fandoms and not delicious sugar treats.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 02/08/2006 07:31 PM EST

You know what?

"Victoria's Place" sounds a lot better than "Mystie's Place." I'm sure the others will agree with me.

Chestnuts roasted by Mars @ 02/08/2006 08:07 PM EST

Mars, that article was a good, light-hearted romp through the miseries of life. I loved it.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/08/2006 08:13 PM EST

My first (and actually only real) job out of college was quite the disappointment as well. I graduated with honors in Mechanical Engineering. I did a whole lot of interviews my senior year, and ended up taking a job in my hometown, because it paid what I wanted, and I would be working in injection molding, which was one of the few ME things I had any interest in whatsoever. When I turned up for the first day, I found that I would not be working under the person I had done part of the interview with (who it was assumed then would be my supervisor), but for another man. Neither the guy I interviewed with, nor the one who was supposed to be going to be my boss, who I never met, were actually there that day, and the one who would be my boss wasn't in that entire week. Good planning, huh? When I did finally meet my boss the next week, it was pretty clear he was an alpha male, who was not happy about either the fact his underling was hired without his input, nor that I was a woman. So, started out on a bad foot, without my knowledge or culpability. Soon after, the guy who originally hired me had a heart attack and was out for several months, so I couldn't even go to him to see if I could be placed in a different position, not under the boss who hated me being foisted upon him.

I had 4 years of college, but not a whole lot of experience. They also were in the middle of a big start-up on a project when I was hired, and everyone working on it had been for like a year or more, and it wasn't a good time to be fielding questions or bringing someone else up to speed on the project. It wasn't really something I could research or anything to offer help. I did a lot of hanging around, trying to pick it up, and not get in the way. My boss, already not liking me, seemed to feel it was his job to just throw me out there, and let me figure out for myself ways to be useful.

After awhile of that, my spirit was broken, and I started just trying to look busy rather than trying to find ways to actually be useful. I'm probably one of the few people who actually read the entire Monica Lewinsky statement at the Smoking Gun website. Eventually, after about 6 months, my boss tried to transfer me into another department. I would have been happier under the person who would have been my supervisor (much of the only real work I had done was working with him anyway), but it would have been in the extrusion area, one of two jobs I was interviewing for in the first place, and if I had been offered that one, I would have declined and kept looking. My boss knew I would quit if he transferred me there, and he was right. Actually I had already planned to quit go live with a friend of mine who had moved to California, in a couple months. I just had a little less money saved for the move than I was planning.

I was pretty broken up after this whole thing. I had always been a good girl, and had never really failed at anything I tried (if I didn't think I'd be able to do something I usually didn't start, but I was good at enough things for it not to be a problem). For a long time afterward, I felt that the problems I was having at work had been my own failings. I have since come to the conclusion that I had been in an entirely screwed up situation through no fault of my own, and you don't hire someone right out of college if you want someone you can just tell "go make yourself useful".

Of course, in moving to Cali, I found engineering jobs there are even more competitive (without at least 5, preferably 10 years experience, forget being hired at even entry level), are in sucky locations, and I didn't really want to do it enough to bother continuing to try.

Fortunately, my friend, now my fiance, didn't mind having me around as a kind of housewife. Except for a little stupid part-time office job, I haven't really worked since I moved out there. So, up and comer with so much supposed potential, nosedived and totally bombed once outside the academic world.

On the other hand, the wonderful man who has supported me all these years. He got his GED rather than graduating, due to problems he was having during high school years. I don't think anyone ever suggested college to him. He worked up from being an assistant to a guy who made wedding videos, to doing some Computer Animation and being general computer guy for a small company in Ohio, to doing CG full time for a small movie production house in Cali. While there, he continued to be all around computer guy for his new company, at least part of the time, and at one point was asked to write a database program for the company to use. Doing that on his off-hours, he learned that this programming thing wasn't that hard, and had an idea for another piece of software he could write for the computer animation industry. He got a decent version of that software completed, and in the meantime realized there was a piece of networking software he could write that would have a much wider audience, and maybe he could make enough money off of it to quit his day job. After a year of working basically two jobs, one of them for no immediate pay (the programming), he started selling his new software. A year later, the business was making enough money to allow us to live pretty much anywhere, so we moved back here to Ohio, where we could get a very nice house for the same $ as a crappy little condo out there.

Sales have been even better this last year than the year before. And all of this from a guy who didn't even hardly go to high school, and no one ever expected anything out of (except me, of course! I've always believed in him)

So, now I'm working along with him for his company, and I am way happier than I would have been in any engineering job. I never really made a concious decision about what I wanted to be, I just heard everyone when I was in high school telling me "oh, good grades in math and science, go get an engineering degree".

If I had known then what I know now, I would totally have gotten something in Business or computing instead, because it would help me with this company a heck of a lot more than my engineering degree, which due to my choices I can more or less wipe my ass with now.

Chestnuts roasted by mags @ 02/08/2006 08:17 PM EST

6 wings for $6.95? Thats.......AWESOME!

Million points if you know what thats from.
Aqua Teen Hunger Force, the episode "Ol' Drippy". Shake says it before Drippy pushes him out of the way of an oncoming truck.

And while I am in my freshman year of college and currently holding down a retail job with crappy hours, I got no complaints so far.

That and from a Scene It team game today, I scored 2 free tickets for any movie playing at a Loews theater. If only there was anything worth seeing...

Chestnuts roasted by Invader Norbert @ 02/08/2006 08:23 PM EST

Allison, I went to Stockton, majored in Communications, and graduated in December 2001. I've been out on my own since January 2002, and I STILL haven't been able to find a job. I just don't get what these people want.

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 02/08/2006 08:38 PM EST

I'd just like to say that I went out shopping today and came home with 8 Peeps toys and a bag of Rainbow Popcorn.

Hey Rhino. You know, I drew a picture of you once.

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 02/08/2006 09:17 PM EST

starwenn, wow, I can't believe we were in the same program. Did you have Shen as a professor? Everyone always told me horror stories about him, and I really liked him--I got an A in Theories.

I'm with ya--I just dont understand what companies want from us Comm majors/graduates. They want experience, yet when a posting for jobs say "entry level," it's not the kind of entry level that means "no experience required--we'll train you." So, where do you get this experience?

I interned at CBS-3 in Philly, but TV isn't for me--the hours are crazy as anything. I would have loved to work there--it was a great experience, but I live out near the shore (an hour north from where you used to live!), and its quite a haul to have to commute there everyday--75 minutes each way by train and 30 minutes each way to drive to the train station is hardly a pleasure trip. It's nuts--if I lived closer to Philly, like you do, I would have attempted to tackle one of the Producttion Assistant jobs there.

I have a cousin who lives in Hoboken, who wants me to come live with her so I can work in NYC. She always asks me when I'm coming to live with her. I have a boyfriend, and it would be hard on me to pursue that kind of life.

I applied today for a position in the NBC page program in NYC, an entry-level that required a college degree, internship, and minimum 3.0 GPA. It's a training ground for young Communications/Broadcasting/Journalism-geared graduates. I have wanted to do it since I was in 11th Grade.

Let's see what happens. Till then, I'll call the elementary school tomorrow.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/08/2006 09:24 PM EST

Good job Norbert.

Guess I have to weigh in on the degree thing too. I dropped out of college after a year (and 18 credits, oops) because I realized I never wanted to go in the first place. Now I'm workign at a guitar store in a mall, saving money to start a business in Indiapolis. I'm going to start a retro nostalgia store. I guess it just depends on the person, but college definetely wasn't for me.

Chestnuts roasted by TommyDay @ 02/09/2006 03:06 AM EST

How's bout those Xbox 360 bundles on amazon...

Chestnuts roasted by dohopoki @ 02/09/2006 04:51 AM EST

Thanks, everyone, for the kind words and wishes. Sorry doho.

Mystie, the likeness is uncanny. You even captured my sad eyes and the majestic curvature of my fore-horn.

Hmm... How come things are never just canny...?

Chestnuts roasted by Rhino @ 02/09/2006 08:33 AM EST

why am I being apologized to again?

Chestnuts roasted by dohopoki @ 02/09/2006 09:36 AM EST

Rhino: They are if they are clever, shrewd, or prudent. Although nobody much uses the word "canny" these days outside of Scotland.

Next week: An in-depth look at the surprising etymology of the words "guy," "pork," and "juggle." Brought to you by Unemployed English Majors Incorporated.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 02/09/2006 09:46 AM EST

"Get a degree," they said. "Any degree will do," they encouraged.

ARRGH! I've gotten that too. After my life-long dream turned out not to be anything like I expected, people kept saying, "Maybe you should consider going to school now." "For what? I don't have a clue what I want to do." "Who cares? Just get a degree in anything." Yeah, tell that to my husband's friend working at the Men's Wearhouse with his anthropology degree. I still think that's an incredibly stupid argument, but one that many make. I remember one of the things that turned me off about college when I was in high school was that, for most everyone I knew who was going, college wasn't a way to get from here to there, it was a way to postpone having to go into "the real world." I'm definitely not saying that everyone who went to college was like that (in fact, it's more a comment on who my friends were), but I was struck at the sheer number of people I knew who had no direction and were going to college just because it was "what you do". That really enforced in me the need to do something to set myself apart from them. I figured the best way was to have four years of experience behind me when they got the degrees they...I mean their parents...paid for. I think Jedoc hit the nail on the head talking about the parents paying for their kids' educations. I'll just say from my personal experience that the people I knew who paid their own way through school took it much more seriously than the people I knew who had it handed to them. And there definitely wouldn't be so many college graduates out there if mommy and daddy weren't saying, "I don't care what you get a degree in, just get one. Here's a blank check. Run amok."

Chestnuts roasted by Lori @ 02/09/2006 10:05 AM EST

Well I guess I jumped the gun on the Clancy Lost appearance. Next week, folks. Sorry
(That was an awesome episode anyway though, huh?)

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 02/09/2006 10:16 AM EST

Lori

I'm inclined to agree with much of what you have to say. Well put, if not a bit wordy

Chestnuts roasted by ZiZak @ 02/09/2006 11:30 AM EST

mmmmMMMMmmm.... Peeps.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 02/09/2006 11:38 AM EST

Hey wasn't there an episode of Malcolm in the Middle where they dare Francis to eat 50 Peeps claiming it can't be done as they will expand in your stomach?

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 02/09/2006 12:48 PM EST

I don't know, but I stopped watching Malcolm around season 2...

Here is a link to my friend Shannon's post (with lots of pictures) about her boyfriend's Peeps-eating contest (Seems like 37 is the point of peep-fullness, although that seems awfully low to me. If I weren't on a diet, I would outpeep these people.).

Chestnuts roasted by mtrox @ 02/09/2006 01:22 PM EST

I don't know, but I stopped watching Malcolm around season 2...

Here is a link to my friend Shannon's post (with lots of pictures) about her boyfriend's Peeps-eating contest (Seems like 37 is the point of peep-fullness, although that seems awfully low to me. If I weren't on a diet, I would outpeep these people.).

http://www.xanga.com/remyartista/387858640/item.html

Chestnuts roasted by mtrox @ 02/09/2006 01:23 PM EST

Am I wrong to let Fashion by David Bowie rock my world? If so, I don't wanna be right.

We are the Goon Squad, and we're coming to town! Beep beep!

Chestnuts roasted by ZiZak @ 02/09/2006 02:27 PM EST

I went straight into university out of high school. I was 17, but KNEW I wanted to be a high school teacher since age 9.

Graduated with a BA and a BED in 2004 at 22 years old. Worked call center jobs, fast food, substitute teaching, and then taught ESL English last year in Korea.

Now I am teaching English full time at my OLD HIGH SCHOOL. Already. I didn't think I would wind up back in this town until I was old enough to teach for a final year and then retire! So, I am 24, and have a full time job teaching with all of my old teachers...I feel like I never really accomplished much, just ran back home.

I am enjoying it, for the most part, but it is TOUGH- this is a poor area and these kids are NOT good students. Some are drug addicts, some are sellers, some are 18 years old and still in my grade 10 class...It's rougher than I thought.

I want to go back to University!

Chestnuts roasted by Muppet Baby @ 02/09/2006 03:28 PM EST

squee4242
Yes, LOST was great last night. I like Sawyer being evil again.
I didn't know Clancy Brown was going to have guest spot on lost. I wonder what he will be? He has freaked me the f' out ever since Pet Sematary 2.

Chestnuts roasted by Geoffinsanity @ 02/09/2006 03:43 PM EST

I want to go back to Stockton!! God, I miss it there!! It's not like I lived on campus, but still, I really liked it.

Got some great news today--turns out to teach in my old elementary school district, I only need 60 credits (I have 128--obviously eligible for graduation). I have to pick up a packet at the Administration office. I'm going to do just that tomorrow.

My district is in a really middle-class town--I went to school there from 1988 to 1995--Kindergarten through sixth grade. I bet the teachers would be shocked to see me there, if they even remember me!! Most of my old teachers are still there!

Muppet Baby--there were two kids in my graphics class in high school that were the same age as me at the time (18), but here's the difference--I was in twelfth grade, and their were in tenth!! Oh man, I can't imagine. Good luck to you!

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/09/2006 03:43 PM EST

Mystie: I vaguely remember that Malcolm episode. Don't remember what season it happened though (definately in the first 3, since he was still in military school then). Malcolm is still good, but at the same I'm kinda glad it's ending.

Lost was good last night. I like scheming Sawyer, but I'm not sure about an evil Dominic.

I'm doing a sort of "find a job meet and greet" tomorrow where I just visit places that may sound interesting to work at, but don't apply to I believe. Hope something comes out of it.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 02/09/2006 04:38 PM EST

Has anyone seen the Ford Explorer commercial with Kermit the Frog rock climbing, biking, and hiking? I love that ad! Kermit is so CUTE!!!!!

I was watching Leno last night, and the segment was "Sidewalking." A group of choir students from Princeton University sang a medley of Muppet Show songs, including Menah Menah. great to know what New Jersey college students are learning. No wonder Jersey's a laughing stock.

I myself, however, like the Menah Menah song.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/09/2006 04:47 PM EST

That is a great commercial Allison. One of the first CD's I ever bought was the Muppets 25th Anniversary Collection. It's got almost all of my favorite Muppet songs on it (the only obvious obmissions to me is the "I've Got Class." from the Great Muppet Caper and "It's Time for Saying Goodbye." from the Muppets Take Manhattan.

Still my favorite CD.

Chestnuts roasted by JLAJRC @ 02/09/2006 05:18 PM EST

Man. I've been reading back through the thread, and overall, this has been one of the most depressing blogs ever. But it's not too late to salvage it. Here, I'll start: kittens kick ass. They're just so fuzzy.

Chestnuts roasted by Jedoc @ 02/09/2006 05:28 PM EST

I once saw a kitten get run over by a truck.

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/09/2006 06:01 PM EST

Mmmmm.... oh man, this is such a good Shamrock Shake. Mmmmmm... it's like a minty lactose orgy in my mouth. Oh man you guys are missing out.

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 02/09/2006 06:04 PM EST

Shamrock Shakes are amazing.

What else is amazing? My Wal-Mart has freshly stocked shelves of ALL THREE monster cereals--Count Chocula, Frankenberry, and Booberry. Is Boo going to be expanded year-round?

Chestnuts roasted by mtrox @ 02/09/2006 06:07 PM EST

Mystie, you stoll those goggles from Rog of I-Mockery didn't you! And why do you get a shamrock shake? I want one too.

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/09/2006 06:08 PM EST

And by stoll I mean stole.

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/09/2006 06:09 PM EST

Nope. I actually bought those goggles at Otakon '02, I think. They were always my big round anime goggles. I didn't even realize they were the same as RoG's til a couple months ago.

Also Shamrock Shakes are on sale as of now. While I was stocking shelves at work today the radio was on. The ads were playing and then I heard the magical words out of no where -- "Shamrock Shake." I didn't even stop home, I drove straight to McDonald's after work and sure enough, Shamrock Shakes!

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 02/09/2006 06:14 PM EST

I was just watching "Parenthood."
It is such a wonderful movie--always reminds me that no family is perfect. That, and the idea that having a kid named "Cool" is, well, you know. Cool.

I remember seeing it in 1st grade way back in 1989, and the part with the vibrator. The little girl asks, "Mommy, what was that?" And Mary Steenburgen says, "It was an...electric ear cleaner." I actually believed for a few years that the "electric ear cleaner" was exactly that.

Then I turned 11 and wisened up...a little. I think I saw it in another movie (a more risque movie), and heard the word "vibrator." Or perhaps I had a friend or classmate who said it. I don't know. It's proof I'm not completely oblivious.

anyway, great movie though. If you've seen it, I'm sure you'd agree that it was wonderful--if not, that's ok. Perhaps I'm just a sentimental sap who sighs over the cutesy scenes in movies.

It could be worse...oh wait, I DID laugh when Dennis Miller died in "The Net." Or...darn it, I yelled "MORE!" when Freddie Prinze Jr. ran around with the thong exposed in "Summer Catch." Or...shit. I watched with keen interest as Michael Douglas and Glenn Close carry on their torrid affair in Fatal Attraction. But, who didn't? And, oh...damn, I laughed when the bunny was found boiling in the pot. But, not after I freaked out. I like bunnies. Especially cute white ones with scary red eyes that remind me of the novel "Bunnicula" when I was in 3rd grade.

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/09/2006 06:27 PM EST

I always wash down my kittens with a Shamrock Shake.
(Unbeknownst to the posters of X-E, Mystie uses her special goggles to spy on them through their monitors. Indeed, her goggles, they do something!)

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 02/09/2006 06:29 PM EST

Man, Mystie always gets the good stuff. My goggles, they do nothing!

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/09/2006 06:43 PM EST

shamrock shakes are back? that means I cant buy another mcds milkshake until the promotion is over I hate the things, I mean, why does anyone even like them? They are so nasty. McDs does not *flush* the milkshake lines after each shake they make so I often get alot of stuff mixed up in my vanilla. Getting a good bit of chocolate is a nice surprise (I love the chocolate ones they are just too sweet to take in a large one at once) and the strawberry is tolerable, but last year around March I got a milkshake and it was the worst thing I had ever tasted. Turns out it had some of that shamrock stuff in it and UGH I could not go back and buy another one for months.

Then again I havent had one since maybe... August ?? I got one around midnight on my way to work one night and it was watery and the most horrific tasting thing ever. It didnt even taste like any of the flavors and kind of tasted like some kind of cleaner. It was disgusting. Have been wary of their shakes ever since. Which sucks, because I love them.

Chestnuts roasted by Kittycatgirl @ 02/09/2006 06:50 PM EST

HEY LOOK WHAT I FOUND>>

Sex is the great mystery, especially for teens who are virgins (and, no matter what you’ve heard, that’s most of us). Even teens who have had sex aren’t very experienced.

So, we’re curious about sex. And that’s totally normal.

Sometimes it seems like the only way to find out about sex is to just do it. But that’s usually a bad idea. The more you know about sex before you do it, the better, safer and healthier your future relationships will be, experts say.

So, we decided to ask some adults a couple of questions that most teens are dying to get answered. First, we wondered, what makes a good lover? Does, for example, the size of a guy’s penis or the shape of a woman’s breasts have anything to do with it?

Nope. Good lovers have a few things in common, but body parts aren’t one of them. They know how to communicate. And they know how to listen to and respect their partners.

“It’s important for two people to look at each other and say, ‘We hardly know anything about sex. Let’s not pretend we know,’”says Marty Klein, Ph.D., a California-based counselor and sex therapist. “Let’s be open with each other. Let’s admit how we feel.’’

“No one is born a good lover,’’ adds Eva Goldfarb, Ph.D., an assistant professor of human sexuality at Montclair State University in New Jersey. “You have to learn. The only way you learn is to ask and communicate with your partner before, after or during sexual activity.”

Real Life vs. Movies

Real life sex is different from sex in the movies where everything happens magically. It takes time to learn what gives you and another person pleasure. And it takes maturity and courage to be honest with someone else about how you really feel.

That’s why the best sex often happens in a committed, caring relationship between two adults who can really communicate and listen to each other, Klein and Goldfarb agree.

So does being a good lover include respecting your partner’s feelings, even if that person doesn’t want sex? Definitely. Sexual contact—whether it’s kissing or sexual intercourse—is usually about pleasure and expressing your feelings for someone. There’s nothing pleasurable about being pressured into having sex.

Being a good lover also means talking about precautions—namely birth control and condoms to prevent disease.

“Birth control is not unsexy,” says Klein. “It actually makes sex more pleasurable because you worry less about pregnancy and disease once you use it. Birth control isn’t for dorks. It’s a part of sex.”

The other thing we were curious about was orgasms. What are orgasms? Does everyone have them? How do they feel?

Orgasm, Goldfarb explains, is the way your body responds to being sexually excited. When orgasms happen, your body gets tense. Muscles in the genital area contract to release that tension. And it feels good.

Some people say orgasms feel like a slow build-up with an intense—or peak—moment of excitement. Others say their entire body tingles. Everybody feels different.

Gender Differences

Men and women usually have orgasms in different ways and at different times. (The simultaneous orgasms you see in the movies seem swell, but it hardly ever happens that way). Men usually have orgasms during sexual intercourse, while many women don’t. Most women need direct touching (stimulation) of their clitoris to have an orgasm, Goldfarb explains. Some women have a difficult time reaching orgasm—it either takes a long time or just doesn’t happen at all. (Both men and women can have sex without having orgasms.) Usually, men ejaculate when they have an orgasm. Many women don’t, although some say they do.

So, are orgasms the best thing about sex? Not always.

“Some orgasms feel like the Fourth of July with a big explosion and fireworks,’’ Klein says. “Others are like Labor Day. You work real hard, and by the time it happens it’s hardly even worth the trouble. And others are like Arbor Day—kind of boring.”

So here’s the most important thing we learned. Sex can be an important part of a relationship, but it’s not the most important thing. You can have a close, romantic relationship without sex. Even though the media make it seem like sex is all teens think about, surveys show it’s not. Most important are school, friends, work and hobbies.

There’s no reason for sex to be such a mystery. Look for an adult who is willing to answer your questions. (It might be embarrassing, but it’s way better than making your own mistakes). If you can’t find an adult to talk to, check out the library. There are plenty of good, honest books that can help you understand the mysteries of sex. (Also check out our resource section under "Sex".

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/09/2006 08:21 PM EST

Sooooo.....um....Darth Poop? Where did you find this?

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/09/2006 08:24 PM EST

Was that the real Darth Poop or the NegaPoop?

Chestnuts roasted by Mystie @ 02/09/2006 08:27 PM EST

Allison, I only had Shen for one class, but he was really nice and helpful. I don't know where people got the idea he's mean.

One of the reasons I moved up here is because I want to look into production assistant jobs, and similar. I'd love to sell my short stories, too, if I knew where. They're kinda my therapy. My internship was a short video on Stockton reactions to the 9/11 disasters for the Camden PBS. I've tried some of the local stores, but no one seems to be hiring. It's just so discouraging.

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 02/09/2006 09:13 PM EST

You know, starwenn, I remember someone video taping me in the library in the fall of 2001 about my reaction to September 11th. It was in November, I think. I remember someone asking me if I wanted to talk about 9/11. Weird coincidence!

Chestnuts roasted by Allison @ 02/09/2006 09:40 PM EST

I like the shamrock shakes. I would be forever greatful, however, if McD's brought back the chocolate vanilla twist cones. Man I miss those.

Chestnuts roasted by kb @ 02/09/2006 09:48 PM EST

starwenn, I had an old copy of one of Matthew Lesko's Free Money books, and it had a big section of names and addresses for publishers and what kind of writing they were looking for. No idea how reliable the info is but I had never seen it gathered together like that and thought it was neat.
Re: Lost: I don't think Charlie's gone evil...I've always thought he was totally irritating but generally sweet, and now he's just losing his shit. When they revealed that he was the one I had an attack of "sweet christmas this is awesome". I really liked this most recent ep...I'd call it my Season 2 fav but that would be pretending The Other 48 Days didn't exist. The 23rd Psalm was pretty great too
I'm assuming Clancy B. will appear in a flashback, which means it could really be anything. Just hoping it's not a blinkandyou'llmiss.

Chestnuts roasted by squee4242 @ 02/09/2006 10:43 PM EST

Hit and never miss rep your click and throw them high cuz Darth poop is the answer to the game like allen i middle finger to the sky if you dont want that reply then you a motha #*$@kin lie!

Chestnuts roasted by Darth Poop @ 02/09/2006 11:19 PM EST

Holy cow, Allison, that was probably me! It was in front of the Media Center in the library basement (where I worked at the time), and I was just randomly grabbing anyone who came by because I had to turn in my project soon and I was really desperate. I even got in front of the camera myself. I haven't thought of that in ages.

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 02/10/2006 12:40 AM EST

Squee: Yeah, I've gotta get back to a library, but I'm still finding my way around here. There's a big one near the Super Fresh in Haddon; the tiny library in Oaklyn had nothing.

Chestnuts roasted by starwenn @ 02/10/2006 12:43 AM EST

re: Darth Poop's essay^^^^

For me, sex is a lot like Guy Fawkes Day: a lot of noise, a lot of flash, and the burning of an effigy.

Chestnuts roasted by kingklash @ 02/10/2006 11:50 AM EST